If you’re the kind of person that like a raw recount of a motherly day to day life, find Constance Hall and be enthralled and amused by her hilarious view of the world. An honest journal of the feeling of failure, anger and torture but being able to laugh her way through. Because telling the truth doesn’t mean we love our kids any less, it just means we don’t glorify the reality that is bringing up children and we don’t make others feel like it’s all cupcakes and rainbows.
A couple of weeks ago a child therapist that I know looked at my kids and said,
“You’re such a good mum”
Feeling like a total fraud I blurted, “I don’t feel like a good mum. The kids are driving me so crazy, I’m losing my temper and falling asleep at night wondering where I’m going got get the patients for another day”
To which she responded with a statement that I haven’t been able to forget,
“Babies cry, it’s how they communicate. Toddlers scream, children whinge and teenagers complain.
Then mums say the words ‘for fuck sake under their breath before every responding. It’s how we communicate.
But guess what Con? It’s better then silence.
A house full of screaming kids and fighting teenagers and a parent who’s being thrown every question and request is a healthy one to me.
It’s the silent children, the scared toddlers, the teenagers that don’t come home and the parents who aren’t in communication with their children that I worry about.
And kids don’t drive you crazy, you were crazy already. That’s why you had them.”
And just like that, I felt like a good parent again.
Deep breaths, you’re doing a good job.